Ahh, the joys of messy babies. David can't stand watching him eat, but I think it's cute, the way he two-fists his mac and cheese into his mouth, dropping the vast majority all over the floor. Natalia loves to sit next to Ben's chair. It's a feast for her every meal. If only we could keep him in a high chair, and not on the table. He has squirmed out of every chair we've tried. I can't tell you how many times I hear a happy scream in the kitchen and go running in to find him marching around the kitchen table, waving his arms. It's just like 7 years ago with Sophie. I hope we survive it.

Sleeping...better, but Sunday night he screamed from 5:00 am until 6:30, when I finally got him up to keep him from waking the other kids. Turned out he had strep. Along with all three of the other kids. Joy. So all six of us are being treated with a killer antibiotic to try to get rid of the darn infection once and for all. Sophie's had it 3 times in the last 2 months.

We're getting ready for a trip to the St. Joe river in Idaho at Paul and Cindee's cabin. We'll be leaving Friday (if I can actually get my act together and pack in time) and returning July 3. Wish us luck on the long long drive.

Oops. Everybody Help Me Out, Please!!!

So I was trying to get all fancy-ish with my blog background and edited the HTML or what-have-you.

It erased my links list. Plus it looked stupid. I'm back to simple.

SOOOO...Please comment for me here so I can link back to your blogs and get the real website so I can have your links here again.

This means you. Do it. Now. And if you haven't commented before but want me to link to your blog, then DO IT. The more, the merrier, right?

Good News. Really.

Two nights ago he was up at 12 and 5 again, but he cried for only FIVE minutes.

Last night HE SLEPT UNTIL 6:00.

Let me say (I mean type) that again.

BENJAMIN SLEPT FROM 9:30 UNTIL 6:00.

Glory glory Hallelujah.

I hate to jinx myself by being too excited, but you have to understand that I have not had a full night's sleep since I was seven or eight months pregnant with this now 14 month old darling.

On to tonight...

Catching Up

Last night was harder. He cried at midnight for more than 30 minutes, then again at 5:00. I'm tired.

Off the sleeping subject (which becomes more and more tiresome every day), here are some catch up pictures.

Success?

Saturday night I spent three and a half hours on the floor next to the crib. I woke up Sunday with a sore throat and a determination NOT to spend any more nights on the floor next to the crib, so last night I tried a new tactic...crying it out. I have not felt good about doing it until now, but finally it felt like it was the right time. He'd calmed down at night more and I figured he cries in the carseat before falling asleep, and he understands so much cause and effect that it might just work finally.

So last night he didn't wake up until 5:00 (!!!) and then I patted his back, put his blanket over him and let him wail. He cried in waves and finally fell back asleep within about 20-25 minutes. It wasn't terrible, and he woke up happy.

We're getting closer.

It Was a Long Night. Plus, some pictures

It wasn't a great night. I walked him around at 1:30, got him to sleep, but every time I laid him in his crib, he'd wake up and cry. I finally decided if he was going to cry anyway, I might as well let him cry it out. I put some cushions next to his crib so I could lie down but still pat his back or hold his hand. I spent 5 hours on the floor. It was not my best night ever.

Tonight's got to be better, right?

We had dinner at Sugarhouse Park with Eric and Christina last night. I enjoyed my pad thai until a seagull noticed I was away from the table and helped himself to my noodles. Bummer. The cousins had a great time playing in the stream. It was a fun night. David's been gone to Denver since Wednesday and it was nice to have something to keep us busy.

Update #2

One Less Waking!!!! It's true! 11:30 and 3:30...let's keep our fingers crossed for tonight.

We just got back from the Salt Lake Swimming and Tennis Club. We joined this year and it has been so fun already. I love seeing so many people from the neighborhood and it's great to just have a place to hang out. Sophie is much more brave this year and is swimming better. I was able to get all three of the big kids in lessons at the same time and that has been wonderful. Ben just toddles around the pool and I follow along right behind. It's not exactly relaxing, but maybe it will be next year when he can play in the kiddie pool without me hovering over him.

So let's see how tonight goes. One waking? Is that asking too much?

Did it work? Did I give in?

I did NOT give in! Woo hoo!

So update on the Ben sleeping through the night goal...

I didn't let him cry it out. I swaddled him up each time he woke up crying (12, 2:30, 4:30), then walked him around until he was asleep then put him back in the crib. So I guess I was still a crutch. BUT it was the first time in 10 months that I didn't have to nurse him 3 or more times a night. Hooray! We're making progress.

Wish us luck. I'm hoping for one less waking tonight. Maybe it will happen...

Zombie Mom Signing Out

School's Out and I'm a Wreck

Who thought it was a good idea to let me have my kids all day long? Day after day? After day? Whoever it was should be forced to watch me try to deal with the whining and complaining and bickering. I am not doing a very good job of it. I have screamed more than I'd like to admit, and I have, in just the last three days, used the word "brat," "selfish," and "butt" (as in "get off your"). Boy. Not such a great start.

In fact, tonight Josh told me I needed to go to bed as soon as I'd fed Ben and waited for my sheets to dry. He told me I needed more sleep so I could be a nicer mom tomorrow. Thanks, kid. I needed that.

So tonight's entry is short and sweet. David's in Denver for the American Symphony Orchestra League convention. The rest of us went to Eric and Christina's for dinner to celebrate sweet Will's 5th birthday. I love that boy. He's got such a tender heart, a quick mind, and a wild streak. A very entertaining combination. I LOVE having them live close. Love it love it love it.

Tonight's goal: no feeding Ben in the middle of the night.

School's Out For Summer...

School's Out Forever.



Boy, this video is disturbing. Who thought Alice Cooper and the Muppets were a good fit?

But today it feels like school is out forever. Josh graduated from sixth grade yesterday, and today was yearbook signing day. So for him, his elementary years are done. Forever. He has been dreading this day for a couple of months. His grade is, frankly, a remarkable group of kids. The teachers all agree that they are unusual. They are kind to each other, they are funny, they are sensitive, they are hard-working. And they don't all go to the same junior high school, which stinks. So yesterday at the promotion ceremony there were a lot of tears. But I'll tell you, the tears yesterday were just a precursor to today's, which were flood level. When I walked to the school right before the bell rang, the kids and teachers were all outside signing yearbooks and saying goodbye. The first thing I saw was the sixth grade boy group. They were bawling. Weeping. Hugging each other. They were a mess. These are the sports boys, the cool boys, and they were more emotional than the girls were yesterday. It was W-I-L-D. (The girls were wrecks, too.)

There's something so sweet and so tender about boys like these feeling free to share their emotions. They haven't been shut down yet. They are comfortable with each other like they would be with family. I'm grateful Josh has had friends like these for seven years. There are few boundaries. Religion doesn't matter, the sports you play don't matter, family circumstances don't matter. I hope he can keep that open heart for the rest of his life. I'm sad, too. I hate to see this time in his life end. The innocence is fading for all of them. Junior high is a new road. I hope he can keep a pure heart, even while so many others of these kids will find themselves walking hard paths. I hope he can always find friends to help him enjoy life, to learn, to care about others, and to stay strong when there are hard choices to make.