Thursday, September 9, 2010

My Messages from Beyond

So, every once in a while, Brent's email address still pops up in my inbox. His email has obviously been hacked, and I know very well what kind of message I'll find, but I open every one anyway.

Today is the three-month anniversary of his death. I've been thinking about him all day. And when I checked my email, I had a new message from "Brent."

And this is apparently what he wants me to know:

Dear friend,
Haven`t seen you for a long time! How are you recently?
I would like to introduce you an international foreign trade company:sei-Mart. they trade mainly in many kinds of famous electornic products.
All of their products are very good in quality, and the price is low. It is really a good opportunity for us to do shopping.
Well do is better than well say, just do it!
Their website: (I blocked it out)
Have a good time!

Yes, friend, it HAS been a long time. Too long. And I can't stand how long it will be before I see you again.

How am I recently? I am doing better, most of the time, but I am missing you all the same.

I know...I should just delete the messages when they show up, but I love seeing his email address in my inbox.

I love it, but I also really really hate it.

It's not an straightforward process, this losing someone you love. Grief is full of twists and turns, full of peace and pain, full of learning and being angry and being grateful. And I wish we hadn't been put on this path. The price we've paid for the learning is the steepest you can pay.

Do me a favor today. Go tell your brothers and sisters you love them.

Because, as "Brent" said:

Well do is better than well say, just do it!


Liz said...

Is it OK that that made me laugh and cry all at the same time? I love you my sistah!!! See you Saturday?

Tracy said...

Ah... I loved this. So, so hard. Love ya!

Brett T. Abbott, Esq. said...

Funny to see that. I had been thinking a lot about him the other day. My son (7) stills prays for him. I tell him that we don't need to pray for him, and he says he forgot - that he needs to pray for the Youngberg's. Thanks for posting that. I miss him a lot.